honest answers
If you're new to this conversation, start here. These are the questions people actually ask about Side B Christianity and about what soulintension is. Short answers first, with a little more underneath.
Side B is a way of following Jesus that holds a traditional Christian sexual ethic while fully affirming the dignity, humanity, and belonging of LGBT people. In practice that means believing marriage is between a man and a woman and that sex belongs within that covenant, while insisting that gay, lesbian, bisexual, and same-sex attracted people are fully welcome in the church and loved by God exactly as they are.
Side A affirms same-sex marriage and sexual relationships as fully consistent with Christian faith. Side B holds a traditional sexual ethic, believing marriage is between a man and a woman, while still affirming the full dignity and belonging of LGBT people. Both take Scripture and the lives of LGBT Christians seriously. They land in different places on the ethics of same-sex relationships.
Side X generally refers to the belief that same-sex attraction should be resisted as something to be changed or eliminated, often paired with the expectation that a person shouldn't identify as gay at all. Side B is different because it doesn't treat orientation change as the goal and doesn't ask people to hide or deny their experience. soulintension is a Side B space, and it isn't a place for debating these positions against each other.
Not as a blanket rule. Side B holds that sex belongs within marriage between a man and a woman, so a Side B person who is same-sex attracted and not in that kind of marriage isn't pursuing a same-sex sexual relationship. How that gets lived out varies from person to person, and celibacy isn't framed as the automatic or default path for everyone. These are personal, prayerful decisions, not a formula.
No. Side B doesn't claim that faith will change someone's orientation, and it doesn't promote conversion therapy. It doesn't ask people to pretend they aren't gay or to chase a change that may never come. The focus is on following Jesus honestly, not on becoming straight.
soulintension is a Side B community serving the North Bay of California (Sonoma, Marin, and Napa counties), for LGBT people and their allies who want to explore faith in Jesus honestly. It's a mid-week gathering and a set of resources built for people navigating faith and sexuality, especially those who've felt like they don't have a place in church.
It depends what you mean. soulintension fully affirms the dignity, humanity, and belonging of every LGBT person, and it holds a traditional Christian view of marriage and sexuality. So it isn't affirming in the Side A sense of blessing same-sex marriage, but it's wholehearted about welcoming and valuing LGBT people rather than treating them as a problem to fix.
It's for LGBT individuals exploring or returning to faith, straight allies who want to love the LGBT people in their lives well, and family and friends trying to understand someone they love. You don't need to have your theology sorted out or be at any particular point in your journey to belong here.
No. Nobody is required to hold a Side B view to belong, and honest questions and respectful uncertainty are genuinely welcome. soulintension is a Side B community by conviction, but it isn't a debate forum, and you won't be asked to sign onto a position at the door.
No. soulintension is a community and a ministry, not a church, and it isn't meant to replace one. If you have a church you love, come anyway. If you don't, or you're not sure church is possible for you right now, this can be a place to start.
soulintension gathers mid-week in the Santa Rosa area of Sonoma County, and support extends across the North Bay, meaning Sonoma, Marin, and Napa counties. Specific times and the meeting location are shared when you reach out, so the best next step is to get in touch through the connect page.
No. soulintension serves the whole North Bay, so people in Sonoma, Marin, and Napa counties are all welcome. The mid-week gathering meets in the Santa Rosa area, but you don't need to live in Sonoma County to belong, and the resources and one-on-one connection aren't tied to any one town.
The connect page is the place to start. You can use it to ask about the next gathering, request one-on-one conversation, or invite soulintension to speak or facilitate an event.
No. soulintension is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit, and gathering with the community doesn't cost anything.